“I would like to make a toast to lying, stealing, cheating and drinking. If you’re going to lie, lie for a friend. If you’re going to steal, steal a heart. If your going to cheat, cheat death. And if you’re going to drink, drink with me.”

Anonymous Toast

Many people get stunned when they hear knocking of the metal fork on the wine glass that follows with the words: “Attention please!” and then “Let’s hear what Michael will tell us”. The oppressive silence usually emerges after those words. Michael, that gets into an uncomfortable position as a victim, remains alone with many pairs of eyes looking on him with one thought in his head; to become invisible in this moment.

Keep in mind that some people like to observe the sacrifices (maybe this pleasure is in their nature from ancient ancestors who required food and show. Shows!) It doesn’t matter whether it is cheerful or sad. That is why they create such awkward situations for other people.

It can be difficult to give a great toast if you’ve never done it before. Sure, you see the movies where toasts are spoken as if they are poetry, seemingly with no forethought or effort. You might find it difficult to do this, which is why you should give a toast like the famous.

As James Nardel from EasyWeddingToasts.com wrote:

You should be prepared! Even mega stars such as George Clooney who just found out he will be hosting Brad and Angelina’s wedding come prepared. Sure, he is the typical alpha male that seems relaxed and ready for anything, but do not kid yourself into believing that he will be able to host the wedding and give a toast without some planning! There will be plenty of people at Brad and Angelina’s wedding as well as any other upcoming celebrity wedding that will have had some help in writing their toast for the famous couple!

A toast is a speaking opportunity, a mini-speech, and should be treated with care. So here are some tips if you find yourself called upon to give a toast:

Prepare the Toast

STEP 1: Keep it brief and to the point. This is not a speech, not a eulogy; just something under two minutes, and maybe a minute, and just keep it as brief as possible. Some of the best toasts are just a single line or two.

STEP 2: Mention an unusually brave, heroic, romantic or awesome act performed by the honoree. It is the time to honor the person being toasted, so speak with sincerity. Make sure that you are saying something about that person that is kind and gracious.

STEP 3: Match the toast to both the honoree’s personality and the event. How do you feel about the person? What do they mean to other people? How do people respond to them as individuals? Are they funny, articulate, smart, a great dresser or a terrific story teller?

STEP 4: Use part of a poem, a famous speech, a quote or even a portion of a love letter in your toast. Search your library or even the Internet for some great quotes to sort of incorporate into your speech. You don’t have to do something overly tacky or sentimental if that is not your personality, but there are some great sentiments that can help you express your thoughts, feelings, and happiness for that person. Most famous people have toasts and speeches prepared for them, and when you do some research you are basically using something old or something you’ve found elsewhere to really help you say what you need to say in an elegant way! Unfortunately, most of us do not have script writers on hand to help us write a toast, so the best thing you can do is look up some great toasts that have been used in history.

STEP 5: Choose simple, but substantial, words to convey your feelings. Be specific and write down all of the adjectives that you can to describe this person.

STEP 6: Weave humor into your toast, but refrain from embarrassing the honoree. What is a funny story or a really great story that you can tell about this person? Is there some secret passion that this person has that causes them to spend excessive time on something? Was there a time that the two of you were together that impressed you or made you laugh? What story can you think of that EXPLAINS what this person is to you? This can be lighthearted or serious, depending upon the tone that you want to create in the room and with the toast. If the assembled group is close, you may refer to shared experiences, but don’t make the toast a private joke between you and a few people.

STEP 7: The story that you tell is extremely important, so write the toast ahead of time. Don’t attempt to wing it.

STEP 8: Even MORE important is how often you practice this speech! Practice it in front of the mirror dozens of times until the words role off your tongue gracefully. Tape yourself as you practice and rewrite it as you go along. Practice visualizing yourself in the room beforehand, and practice looking at people in the eyes so during your speech you’ll be able to do that with ease.

STEP 9: The biggest mistake most people make is that they speak too long and they also often talk about themselves instead of talking about the person they are giving the toast to. A big mistake. Remember that the toast puts the spotlight on the honoree, not on you.

Giving the Toast

STEP 10: Toasting is usually done before or after a meal, so there may be a bit of a commotion. It is okay to clink a glass to get everyone’s attention, or if there is a microphone you may wish to get everyone’s attention that way. Wait until you are sure that all glasses are filled before beginning your toast.

STEP 11: When you are ready to begin, you should stand, holding the glass in your right hand. Stand straight and strong. Make eye contact with those who are near you and with the honoree so you show that are really speaking to them and what you are saying is addressed to them. Also make sure you make eye contact, not just with the person you are giving the toast to, but everybody, so you really establish a feeling of warmth.

STEP 12: Speak slowly and clearly. Make sure that you didn’t drink too much previously. You need to be able to speak loud enough for people to hear and clearly so everyone understand.

STEP 13: When you are ready to conclude your remarks, you should raise the glass with your right hand, holding it out at shoulder level. Then, glance briefly around the audience and ask everyone to raise their glass, then people can clink glasses.

No one has to know that you practiced over and over until it felt right. No one has to know that you changed the toast dozens of times until you got the story right. But what you and everyone else WILL know is that after you’ve given the speech and knocked it out of the park, your status will be elevated.

Making a toast well reflects not only upon the person being toasted, but also upon the speaker. Make it an opportunity to shine.

By presenting an incredible toast you will have created a great memory for the person you are honoring. And THAT is who its all about, after all!

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